Hello. I haven’t written something for quite sometime and it’s been bugging me because it’s far from the goals I’ve set for myself. In fact, I haven’t published anything on my YouTube channel nor Thought Catalog. It’s pretty depressing. I’ve been having, “writer’s block.”
Some people would say, “Jonathan, why do you care so much about this blog when only (on average) 50 people look at your blog a day & when you post something the maximum number of people who have read this page on a single day is 1,000.” I say I do it because to those 50ish people who visit everyday… this blog is for us. The community of people who know that this is an insider look into my the life of my struggles. YouTube & Thought Catalog is what is important when it comes to the viral exposure I want.
I’ve been having Writer’s Block. I’ll tell you what it is and why…
The great horror author Stephen King would say that writer’s block is an excuse (old wive’s tale) for people who are not taking the time just to write on a daily basis: when you don’t write and/or read on a daily basis, you lose your ability to write.
He’s on point.
The struggle I’m facing isn’t necessarily writing. I’ve written around 20-30 different pieces for Thought Catalog, which are all hiding away in a folder called “drafts.” Yes. I’ve written 20-30 drafts for Thought Catalog since my last post, WHICH WAS A MONTH AGO, because every single draft sucks. There is no other way to describe it but it sucks.
I’ll start writing and without warrant and hesitation I’d delete it or think I should let the article marinate in my head for a bit. I can see my writing plummet into the average category. It’s not because I’m not writing, it’s because my mind is thinking about the other projects I”m working on, which makes it hard for me to read… anything.
Before August 8th, I was reading a book every single day. I would finish at least one book every week. This allowed me to write a decent piece at least once a week. But look at me now. I’m struggling.
I can’t even write dialogue anymore. FUCK!
Even as I write this piece I feel myself slipping into the black of hole of deletion and letting this piece hang in the draft category. I’m sorry. I’ve been lazy. But, I need to write and publish something because it’s time I get back on the bandwagon. Please forgive my lack of hideous prose, proper composition, and lack of beautiful metaphorical descriptions that reflect on an intellectual but dreamy matter to sparkle the wow – this fucker can write – factor.
Musings. What I’m Dealing With.
In my last post I wrote about how Not Everyone Is A Winner and told you that I’ve been offered to run a company. I took the opportunity this summer and have spent about $20,000 (a ton of my savings) into the infrastructure of the company. Due to the reasons of privacy because there are people out there who are judging me and probably will make fun of me in weird ways… it involves me hiring Software and Hardware Engineers. In addition to the engineers, I’ve had to make sure that our infrastructure for the manufacturing side of the business is on point with all the supplies.
Thank God we’re talking to some Venture Capitalist and other investors. The only trouble is, is that they’ve given us a hard deadline that we must double the revenue of our company before we receive the funding. The past “CEO” of the company wasn’t really the best and understanding the business of the company. He knew how to start it and bootstrap the situation… but now I’m at a place where I’m using my past interns and resources (money) to make things happen.
In addition, I’m working on a few projects: my podcast, my writing, and my novel. I’ll share the podcast site with you when I launch at the end of the month: it’s stressful because it’s a 5 day a week podcast, with a once a week recap. It’s nerve-ranking putting thins together.
Well, I’m glad I wrote this… I feel it’s become an update piece.
Hell, at least I’m writing something.
I’m ready to publish my ThoughtCatalog piece now.
One step at a time. Thank you for listening.